Social anxiety is a type of anxiety disorder that causes fear and anxiety in social situations. People with social anxiety worry about being judged, embarrassed, or rejected by others. They may avoid or dread social activities, such as group conversations, eating with company, and parties. They may also experience physical symptoms such as trembling, sweating, blushing, or palpitations. Social anxiety is more than just shyness or nervousness. It is a persistent and overwhelming fear that does not go away and affects everyday life. It can interfere with work, school, relationships, and self-esteem. It can also lead to other mental health problems such as depression, panic disorder, or substance abuse.

The causes of social anxiety involve a combination of factors such as genetics, environment, and brain chemistry. Some possible causes are:

• Having a family history of social anxiety or other anxiety disorders
• Experiencing bullying, abuse, or trauma in childhood or adolescence
• Having an overactive amygdala, the part of the brain that controls fear and emotion
• Having low levels of serotonin, dopamine, or glutamate, the brain chemicals that regulate mood and stress
• Having a negative self-image or low self-esteem
• Having unrealistic expectations or standards for oneself or others

Ways to Reduce Social Anxiety

There are many ways to cope with social anxiety and overcome it. Some of the most effective ones are:

1. Be mindful: Mindfulness is a technique that helps you focus on the present moment and accept your thoughts and feelings without judging them. It can help you reduce stress and anxiety and improve your self-esteem. You can practice mindfulness by doing meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, or any other activity that makes you feel calm and relaxed.
2. Visit a café: If you enjoy watching movies online or catching up on your favorite TV show, then try taking your tablet or laptop to your nearest coffee shop. Do an activity you like and feel comfortable with, in an environment that would usually make you anxious. You have the familiarity and comfort of being able to concentrate only on what you’re doing, but will be pushing your boundaries.
3. Challenge your anxious thoughts: Try to identify the thoughts that make you feel anxious and question their validity. For example, if you think that everyone will laugh at you if you speak up, ask yourself how likely that is to happen and what evidence you have for that belief. You may find that your thoughts are exaggerated or unrealistic.
4. Create an exposure hierarchy. Identify and rate how each social situation makes you feel in terms of anxiousness. Start with the least anxiety-provoking situation and work your way up to the most anxiety-provoking one. Then, gradually expose yourself to these situations, starting from the easiest one and moving up to the more challenging ones. For example, you can start by going to a coffee shop and watching a movie on your tablet or laptop, then try to make eye contact with someone or say hello, then join a group conversation or ask a question, and so on. This can help you build confidence and learn that social situations are not as scary as you think.
5. Seek professional help: If your social anxiety is severe or interferes with your daily functioning, you may benefit from seeking professional help. Some treatments can help you manage your social anxiety, such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or medication. CBT is a type of therapy that helps you identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to your anxiety. Medication can help reduce the physical symptoms of anxiety, such as sweating, trembling, or palpitations.
6. Talk to someone you trust: Sharing your feelings and worries with someone who understands and supports you can make a big difference. You don’t have to face social anxiety alone. You can talk to a friend, a family member, a therapist, or a support group. They can offer you emotional support, practical advice, or just a listening ear.
7. Take care of your physical health: Your physical health can affect your mental health and vice versa. Taking care of your body can help you cope with social anxiety better. Some of the things you can do are: eat a balanced diet, drink enough water, get enough sleep, exercise regularly, avoid alcohol and drugs.
8. Try breathing exercises: Breathing exercises can help you calm down when you feel anxious or stressed. They can also help you regulate your heartbeat and blood pressure. One of the simplest breathing exercises is to breathe in slowly through your nose for four seconds, hold your breath for four seconds, then breathe out slowly through your mouth for four seconds. Repeat this cycle for a few minutes until you feel more relaxed.
9. Maintain a diary: Keeping a diary can help you track your progress and identify what triggers your social anxiety. You can write down when and where you felt anxious, what happened, how you felt physically and emotionally, what thoughts went through your mind, how you coped, and what you learned from the experience. This can help you gain insight into your patterns of thinking and behaving and find ways to improve them.
10. Try peer support: Peer support is when people with similar experiences of mental health problems support each other. It can be a great way to share tips, advice, encouragement, and empathy with others who understand what you’re going through. You can find peer support groups online or in person through various organizations.

Remember, social anxiety is not something to be ashamed of or to hide from others. It’s a common and treatable condition that many people struggle with at some point in their lives. You are not alone in this journey and there is hope for recovery. You are a valuable and worthy person who deserves respect and happiness.